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follow View/Controller pattern

Note that I mentioned the change in 1.1 section because I intend to
backport this, if this is not needed I will move it back to Unreleased.

It is more efficient to check for object containment violations at the IR
level instead of in the protocol handlers.  OStatus containment is especially
a tricky situation, as the containment rules don't match those of IR and
ActivityPub.

Accordingly, we just always do a final containment check at the IR level
before the object is added to the IR object graph.

Also in this commit by accident:
- Fix query ordering causing exclude_poll_votes to not work
- Do not create notifications for Answer objects

Our previous list visibility resolver grabbed posts if either follower
collection of the user in a list who is followed is in `to` or if
follower collection of the user in a list was in `cc`. This not only
missed unlisted posts but also lead to leaking private posts when
`fix_explicit_addressing` mistakingly started putting follower collections
to `cc` (also fixed in this MR).

Reported by @kurisu@iscute.moe via a DM

that may be set when fetching activities

Create

Saves quite a bit of time with delete activities because they would
always query the db

Replace Object.normalize(activity.data[object] with Object.normalize(acitivty) to benefit from preloading